I AM The Universe: Random Thoughts

So, I’m out of things to blog about. Except for movies and music, of course So I thought I’d do a follow up on a post I’ve done before, and my favorite kind of post too! The hate post! So here’s a continuation of the list of people I hate!

• People who persist on starting conversation at urinals.
• People who insist on distinction rather than conformity during ba-jama’at prayers. I’ve seen people who stay in the Sajdah for a good thirty seconds or more after everyone has returned to tha Qayam.
• Pakistanis who know Urdu perfectly well, yet insist upon talking to you in English. Dude, what’re you trying to do?
• ppl who rite emails in txts
• People who sign their emails signatures in greens and maroons and purples and oranges and in fonts just as colorful (like Lucida Handwriting?) What is wrong with you!?
• People who go take cares or lolz.. or worse.. take carez.
• People who argue without objective. As in one of Mushtaq Ahmed Yusfis books, when a guy is told Aaj garmi bohot hai, he’d go Nahi, kal is se zyada hogi!
• People who call me Ab-sir.
• Self-righteous bums! I grant that privilege only to myself
• People who go Awww, zara dekho kitna bara ho gaya hai over me. Come on people, did I say Aap ke bhi to sar pe baal nahi rahay when I saw you after ten years?
• People who stare at my receding hairline rather than at my face when talking to me Well, this is an imaginary hate point thus far, but I fear that day isn’t much far away
• People who go all pale and “*gasp* Haaza kufr!!” on you when you wish someone on Christmas.
• People who think Star Wars > Star Trek (or even Voyager > TNG for that matter!). I will not tolerate that kind of ignorance around me!
• People who are so stuck up on their own ideas that they refuse to even consider that some other POV can have some validity. Recently, these people have changed strategies a bit. They will listen to you, but they’d give you the what do you know, you ignorant scoundrel look all the while, which frankly brings my blood dangerously close to a boil. And I don’t like boiling blood. I just like blood

So, there’s part two. I’m guessing there’s going to be a part three sometime into the future as well, because I’m telling you, my list is growing every day! I’m going to end up like one of those angry, intolerably difficult old guys who scare the living bull out of children just by being there

I hate people. Well that’s not entirely true, but I find it easy to hate people because I’m incredibly difficult myself If you’ve known me long enough you should believe me by now on this, but just in case you don’t, let me lay down a list of people I truly, deeply, madly hate

• People who walk/drive/work/talk/think slow. If nothing else, these people should have the courtesy to die quick
• People who peep over into your phone/laptop screen. Some people turn away when you tilt the screen slightly away from them – others adjust their angle for ‘maximum viewing pleasure’. The nerves!!
• People who don’t have table manners. I’m not asking for much here, really. Just keep your mouth closed, don’t make noises, don’t make faces, don’t get food on your knuckles, don’t act like you haven’t eaten in three weeks. Just.. be normal, you know!
• People who make fun of the elderly or people with disabilities.
• People who take the elevator from the ground floor to the first floor. DAMN! I know people at work who use the elevator to go from the fourth floor to the third!
• People who hate dark chocolate.
• People who don’t hate Windows
• People who don’t put their phones on silent in mosques or meetings or seminars.
• People who go “Hello!! Haan!! Bas land karnay wala huun!!” on their phones.
• People who think that they’re Khuda ka noor. Only I am allowed that amount of smugness
• People who can’t change their opinions. Dhitai is the most intense turn-off for me!
• People who just brush their hands across yours instead of shaking them. It’s a bad first impression. Also people who bend to a 45 degree angle to shake your hand. Get a spine!!
• People with deeni ghuroor.
• People who don’t know the line between humor and indecency.

This is just off the top of my head, so beware!

In other news, I scored 94% on that nerd test that’s been going around. What the hell? How does not being a fan of Seymour Cray count me as a non-nerd? (Am I actually down because I’m not a total nerd? :s) I mean, my hero would be Douglas Engelbart! That guy wasn’t just a genius, he was the creative geek!

And I would have ROT-13′d the text if I didn’t have to get back to work (yeah, I was taking the test at work )

Oh, and since YouTube is back up here in Abu Dhabi, I’m posting another song

Goo Goo Dolls – Dizzy (lyrics)

PS: All techies go here. This is really exciting! The first real piece of news coming out of the company that practically invented the smartphone industry since it announced Windows-based phones – and I’ll be honest with you, I wasn’t much excited about that. Let’s see what kind of apps we see for this new WebOS platform – it has some pretty huge shoes to fill, considering the success and size of the legacy PalmOS Garnets software repository! By the way, I love the gesture bar and the first visually-acceptable slide-out QWERTY Not too crazy about the name though – what kind of a name is Palm Pre?